Drunken Comics Rage

First there was Infinite Crisis.

Then there was 52.

Now there is Countdown.

Somewhere the EvilArtist weeps.

As I've stated earlier I'm not a huge DC fan so these massive event titles neither cause me joy or pain as they do our dear Artist friend. But I am paying enough attention to feel something is amiss.

I read Infinite Crisis and truth be told, without the vast well of DC knowledge EvilArtist has at his disposal I'm not sure I could make heads or tails of it. I remembered Crisis on Infinite Earths from back in the day, so I got all those beats. Truthfully the core idea of the “legendary” heroes coming to rescue this world and it's heroes because they lost their way isn't a bad premise. Mind you they didn't stick to that premise, but it was a nice thought. The rest of the book however makes no sense to the average reader. If you weren't aware of the other miniseries that led to it or didn't have your own walking DC wikipedia (like I did) you would have no clue why Starfire and Animal Man were in space or why there was a big ass battle underwater. Those scenes just come in and out without much in the way of clarification. It is just assumed you know the DC universe well enough to know the players and what they are doing.

Then along came 52 to explain the missing year from the “One Year Later” titles.

A year without Superman, Batman and Wonder Woman! Things get majorly fuckered up while they are gone! Read this to find out how!

I remember when it came out thinking what a ballsy idea it was to have a weekly comic for a year. Could such an idea really fly? I mean, what do you do if your readership drops to 1,000 people by week 14? You would really be committed to a sinking ship at that point. So it had me curious from that standpoint.

Not so curious that I would buy it mind you. I could kinda tell from the jump we were talking DC “b” and “c” listers for the most part. So between characters I was certainly less familiar with than the big guns and just the idea of 52 issues at $2.99 a pop to get a complete story, I passed. Sure, I know I probably buy 52 books in a two month period, but those are various titles that I ride in and out of. Most are only asking me to commit to five or six issues for a complete story. Asking me upfront for a commitment of 52 issues is asking a lot.

So for the duration I lived vicariously through EvilArtist as he flipped through the book each week to tell me what if anything might drastically have altered the shape of the DC universe as we know it. Along the way I would hear or read about what seemed like missteps through the series. There was the audible groan and visible cringing from the writers during the panel Didio spilled that the multi-verse was still around (in theory, the big shock ending to the book). Then there was the hype to World War 3. Which strangely occurred during one week of the lost year and took an additional four tie-in issues to fill out the story. As it turned out, the four crossovers covered a good chunk of the “One Year Later” mysteries that they just didn't get around to

Because, well, apparently 52 issues to cover the whole story clearly just wasn't enough.

So World War 3 ends, Black Adam gets his magic word reset (for the record, I'm betting his word is now “punanny”) and we roll towards to the amazing end to 52 (sorry 56 now) discovering that 52 earths now exist. A plot twist already given away months ago by the beloved editor in chief.

And suddenly we have Countdown, the next 52 issue weekly title. What are we counting down to? Pretty much every person on the Internet who has ever heard of DC is saying another Crisis. Perhaps they used the title “Infinite Crisis” too soon.

I read Newsarama's interview with Dan Didio this week. I will say the man certainly feels pretty passionate about what he's doing with these big event books. He truly believes in this idea of an elaborate tapestry that is going on throughout the DC universe that people are going to shit themselves with each turn around a new corner. Even more he believes these books are accessible to even the newest of DC readers.

To which all I can say is bullshit.

Look, I didn't read 52. I can't comment much on the quality of the story inside other than the bits I've heard or read about. But there's really no doubting they went all out for it. They got arguably their four biggest named writers on the book. As might be expected on any event, some loved it and some hated it. Regardless it was hugely successful for DC.

But to sell me on the idea of an elaborate plan from 52 (er, 56) through Countdown running for 104 (sorry, 108) issues?

Sorry, I've got to call “shenanigans”.

No one plans 104 (108) issues/episodes of anything in advance. Not comics, not televisions shows. No one.

Television networks and writers dream of 100 episodes. In most cases 100 episodes puts you solidly into a fifth season. 100 episodes of a tv show is the Holy Grail. 100 episodes gets you to syndication Mecca. Most folks praying for 100 episodes, not planning for it. Hell, the tv show Lost has laid claim to having an elaborate plan and you see what the ratings have bought it. A 50% drop in ratings from season two to season three. And this is season three folks. We're talking 60 and change episodes right now.

So an elaborate plan for DC through 104 (108) issues?

• Not including Identity Crisis.
• Not including Infinite Crisis
• Or the crossover titles that preceded it.
• Not including whatever the hell Countdown is actually counting down to.

Am I alone in thinking that sounds a bit unbelievable?

I've read the exit interviews with the writers of 52 and their thoughts. To a man it's almost the same throughout: great to work with those guys, it was stressful from time to time but we worked really hard, we're really proud of what we accomplished, etc. But when asked about DC doing another weekly title? To a man the answer is pretty much “yeah, good luck with that”.

Even more telling to me is that several of them indicated this was Didio's brainchild. That he kinda wanted the weekly book and tapped them for it. If you read his past 52 interviews and his current Countdown ones, he pretty well makes it sound the same way. That he's the puppet master throughout all this, lining things up for the next “big thing” each time.

So lets say there is an elaborate plan to all this. Lets say Didio has the world largest white board mapping all this shit out to what he believes is the greatest thing to ever happen in the DC universe. I can't help but think one thing from that.

This elaborate plan was created by the guy who thought it would be a good idea to kill Nightwing.

That is until the fanboys went completely apeshit and threatened to go all Keyser Soze on his ass.

Does anybody really feel good about a plan conceived by that mind?

I didn't think so.

See? You didn't even have to read 104 (108) issues to draw that conclusion.

Filed under: DC Comics, DVO Reading Rage