Drunken Comics Rage

So this was the conversation with myself somewhere in the last 48 hours while moving comic boxes from one floor of the house to another. Swear to God, this is how it went.

Man, I don't have the slightest clue about what to post on this week. There hasn't been anything sufficiently rant worthy announced since last week, so that's out. Hell, even Didio hasn't said anything bat shit crazy this week that I know of. Maybe I can just go back to the well and do ye olde weekly reading and drinking list again. I just need to check to see what's on my buy list for this week. What? One comic? That's it? How the fuck am I going to make an entire post about that? It's even X-Factor so it's not like I'm expecting it suck suddenly or anything. It's probably for the best anyhow, I don't even have a decent bottle of wine in the house at the moment. How fucked is that? I write for a site called Drunken Comics Rage and not only do I have no comics rage built up, I can't even drink to help the process along! Geez, have the ideas dried already just three weeks back? Is this how Jordan felt when he came out of retirement? Shit, I'm not even the Jordan of posts. I'm more like that 12th guy of the bench you bring in to just to commit 6 fouls hacking at Shaq when he's the post. Why am I even making that analogy about myself? I don't even like basketball! Hey wait a minute, what's this here? There's like a eight or so comic not in bags at all. These must be like some shit I got for free at a con way back and never even read. And it's like old Image shit too. What!?!? Cy-Gor #1? Spawn of the Undead #1? Witchblade/Wolverine Part 5? HA! Rant problem solved!

So you're not getting any of that today. Mostly because I haven't actually read any of it. But you know it's coming. You will know I have writers block and dug deep into the well for material to talk about when you finally see that Cy-Gor #1 review here.

So maybe some random quick hits instead. . .

Titans #1.  GhostShark liked it. Me? Not so much. I can't rant about it really because its not even really worthy of hate. It's just kind of poorly written. I am admittedly not steeped in DC continuity, so it wasn't until I read some other reviews that I really understood it was badly written for a whole slew of other reasons beyond the ones I had considered. I mean I wanted to like it because this was the basically the Titans team I grew up on ya know? And really the return of Trigon seems like about as good a reason as any to get the band back together. But everything beyond that was, well, bad.

I will say that I think some of the hate I've seen spewed about the art is a bit insincere. Yes, all the women (including the evil demon things) have D cup breasts. Is that so wrong? Hell some people (me) might call a world like that Utopia. But to trash Churchill for not being able to draw anatomy? Really? I mean we are after all talking about books in which the primary characters roll around in painted on colored jammies. If you are pissed about D cup breasts everywhere, you're probably not being very honest with yourself about the superhero comics now, are you?

. . .

So I have a family vacation to Disney coming up the first week of May. It's become something of a tradition of doing a vacation that week with my wife's family. Which also means that I now have a running tradition of getting shafted out of seeing the first big summer movie on opening night (or weekend). Last year it was Spiderman 3, which in hindsight I probably should have been greatful for. This year? That's right, you guessed it. Iron Man.

There was a trailer for it on tv the other night and my wife said "Hey look! I bet your excited to see that."

To which I replied, "Hey! You're right, I am! Guess when it comes out though?"

To her credit, she has graciously agreed to go see ti with me the first night we are in Disney. For those who have never been, Disneyworld has "Downtown Disney" which has an assload of shops, restaurants, etc. It also sports a multiplex theater. So not only am I looking forward to seeing the movie now, but I'm curious to see how many fanboys represent for Iron Man even in the heart of the land of the mouse.

. . .

My comic shop added DC Universe #0 and Final Crisis to my pull without my consent. I only caught it because I asked to see my pull shit because there's about to be a culling. It kinda pissed me off at first, but then I realized at worst it was prime material for a rant down the road. At best, DC editorial stays the fuck out of Grant Morrison's way and lets him tell a story.

I've read and heard a few things with Morrison talking about how in books like Seven Soldiers and 52  he's subtly been playing with the idea the DC universe itself is a sentient being. By and large anything I've touched coming out of the DC universe as of late has been pretty horrible, but when Morrison kicks out an idea like that, it gets my attention. There's no guarantee that's where Final Crisis is going, but I think I'll give it a shot just to see.

. . .

Little DVO's fifth birthday is coming up in two weeks. Among the things he's getting are Green Lantern, The Flash, and Batman action figures from Mattel's DC SuperFriends series of figures. They aren't the coolest superhero figures on the market and the points of articulation on them happen to number exactly the same as the number of limbs they have. But they are about as age appropriate an action figure as I can find.

He insists on clinging to Thomas the Train as being the greatest toys ever made, but I intended to force feed him superheroes until it kills one of us.

He's pretty damned stubborn even at age 5, so I think odds favor his survival over mine.

Filed under: DVO Reading Rage